Music Review: Now! That’s What I Call Music #99

Day 99 brings us to Now! #99, which was released on 23rd March 2018.

March 2018
This is how the world looked in March 2018. I have hundreds of photos from that month depicting things that I was getting rid of in my clothes cull – the joys of digital hoarding – but this is the only one I have of me, although I suspect Mum and Dad probably have some from their visit to Newcastle that month that I’ve not seen yet. Winning my Slimming World group’s Greatest Loser award was one of my highlights of my journey to target. The house, meanwhile, was even messier and full of boxes than it is now.

I’m starting to get a little suspicious that some of the tracks on these latest Now! compilations weren’t actually hits at all.  I know that a) the charts change so rapidly that there too many songs to remember and b) most chart music these days is so generic that it all blurs into one, but my memory is pretty good, and given that all of these songs are supposed to have been in the charts just a few months ago, I’m surprised that there are so many song titles I don’t recognise.  I will have to do some research as we go through them.

We’ve finally reached the current year, 2018!  Let’s see what pop music has come to these days.

Now! That's What I Call Music #99
Track 1: Rudimental, Jess Glynne, Macklemore and Dan Caplen – These Days

Now I know I’m nearly at the end of this long Now! marathon – this track is still currently (as of today, 19th July 2018) in the Top 40.  We’re so close to the end!

I find the tune pretty irritating and the theme a bit awkward, but there’s some good stuff going on with the lyrics.

Track 2: Dua Lipa – IDGAF

Another tune that really annoys me.

Track 3: Portugal The Man – Feel It Still

Great tune, great danceable beat, and a lyric like ‘let me kick it like it’s 1986 now‘ is always going to go down well with me.  Love this one.

Track 4: Justin Timberlake and Chris Stapleton – Say Something

I really like this tune – it builds very nicely.

Track 5: Taylor Swift – Ready For It?

Good atmosphere, but the tune is very forgettable.

Track 6: Marshmello and Anne-Marie – Friends

This one is insidiously catchy and was stuck in my head for weeks earlier this year.  I’m not a fan of the tune or the theme, so it wasn’t pleasant.

Track 7: Bruno Mars and Cardi B – Finesse

I do like that early ’90s feel (which, judging by the style of the video, is deliberate).  Like the callback to Walk This Way too.

Track 8: Sigala and Paloma Faith – Lullaby

Another annoying tune, but it’s got a good beat.

Track 9: Craig David and Bastille – I Know You

I really like the rhythm, but I find the song a bit cheesy.

Track 10: Jason Derulo and French Montana – Tiptoe

Good solid danceable pop song – really like this one.

Track 11: Jax Jones and Ina Wroldsen – Breathe

Good beat, good tune – quite like this track.

Track 12: George Ezra – Paradise

I really like George Ezra’s stuff – it’s so different to the generic EDM-hip-hop-pop lyrically-vapid tuneless mush that makes up the bulk of the charts these days.  This is an upbeat feelgood song with great lyrics and an awesome chant-along bit near the end.

Track 13: Kylie Minogue – Dancing

There is something indescribably comforting about the fact that, thirty years after I Should Be So Lucky became the favourite song of every girl in my nursery school class, Kylie Minogue is still featuring on Now! compilations.  I feel warm and fuzzy inside.

I really like the guitar on this one – it’s a nice, pretty tune with a retro feel.

Track 14: Camila Cabello – Never Be The Same

Pretty tune, but it’s a little slow for me.

Track 15: Mabel and Notes – Fine Line

I quite like the tinkly instrumentals on this one, and it’s a good tune.

Track 16: Sigrid – Strangers

It’s got a good rhythm, but the tune annoys me.

Track 17: Paloma Faith – Guilty

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Paloma Faith on track 8.

As I explained in the intro, there have been a few tracks on Now! compilations recently I’ve not recognised, including this one.  Looking it up, I now know why.  This wasn’t actually a hit – not in the UK or anywhere else.  As such, I’m not sure why it’s been included!

It’s got a great atmosphere and a nice classic feel, though.

Track 18: Pink – Beautiful Trauma

I find this one a bit depressing, though the tune is very pretty.

Track 19: James Arthur – Naked

Too slow for me, and I don’t like the tune.

Track 20: Tom Walker – Leave A Light On

Again it’s a little too slow for me, but it’s got a good epic atmosphere.

Track 21: Calum Scott – You Are The Reason

Another one that wasn’t a hit – it only got to number 43!

This one’s too slow for me, and the tune’s very depressing.

Track 22: Sam Smith – One Last Song

I quite like the retro-sounding instrumentals on this track.

Track 23: Stormzy and MNEK – Blinded By Your Grace [Part II]

Good tune – quite like this one.

Track 24: Post Malone and Ty Dolla Sign – Psycho

Interesting instrumentals, but I don’t like the tune – it’s very repetitive.

Track 25: Blocboy JB and Drake – Look Alive

Not enough melody for me.

Track 26: Khalid – Location

Another non-hit – this only got to number 67!

Great atmosphere and classic feel – quite like this one.

Track 27: NF – Let You Down

I can’t stand this track – the tune and the high-pitched vocals are so irritating.

Track 28: Ramz – Barking

Great track!  Endearing theme, interesting tune.  Big fan of this one.

Track 29: J Hus – Bouff Daddy

Good atmosphere, but the tune’s boring.

Track 30: Cliq and Alika – Wavey

Also not a hit – this one only got to number 44!

It’s got a good rhythm, but I could do with some more melody.

Track 31: Dave and Mostack – No Words

Nice tune, but the rap’s too messy for me.

Track 32: B Young – Jumanji

It’s got an okay beat, but the tune’s very uninspired.

Track 33: Raye and Mr Eazi – Decline

It’s based heavily around an interpolation of 2002 hit Always On Time by Ja Rule and Ashanti.  I just find it very unoriginal.

Track 34: Notes and Mabel – My Lover

Double repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had both Notes and Mabel on track 15.

This tune really irritates me.

Track 35: Rak-Su, Wyclef Jean and Naughty Boy – Dimelo

This is an interesting one.  It was the X Factor winner’s single for 2017, and for the last couple of years the X Factor winner’s single has not been featured on the spring Now! compilation like it used to be – both Louisa Johnson’s Forever Young and Matt Terry’s When Christmas Comes Around were left out, the latter presumably partly because nobody wants to hear an explicitly Christmas-themed song in the spring.  Part of this, I believe, is because of the X Factor‘s decline in popularity recently, but it’s meant we’ve not been following an interesting change.  Louisa Johnson’s winner’s single was a cover as usual – Forever Young was originally a Bob Dylan song – but Matt Terry’s When Christmas Comes Around was an original song (written by Ed Sheeran), which was a first for the X Factor since Shayne Ward’s That’s My Goal, and signalled an interesting move away from its irritating karaoke format.  This move towards original songs continued in the 2017 competition, with many of the contestants (notably Rak-Su and Grace Davies) performing tracks they had written themselves.

As such, this winner’s single from Rak-Su is self-written – an upbeat Latin-tinged hip-hop track with great lyrics and a clever interpolation of Wyclef Jean’s lines from Hips Don’t Lie – and as a result it’s the only X Factor winner’s single I’ve ever liked.  It’s a great track.  It’s just a shame we had to put up with years of awful pointless cover versions to get to this stage.

(I should note that, despite the above essay, I’ve never actually watched the X Factor.  My interest in this stuff is purely from a chart geek perspective.)

Track 36: G-Eazy and Halsey – Him And I

Pretty tune, quite like this one.

Track 37: Sza and Calvin Harris – The Weekend

Another non-hit!  This only got to number 55.

I’m not hugely keen on the tune on this one, but it’s got a good retro-sounding beat.

Track 38: Hailee Steinfeld, Alesso, Florida-Georgia Line and Watt – Let Me Go

Another generic, irritating tune.

Track 39: 5 Seconds Of Summer – Want You Back

Nice tune, but the verse is too slow and cheesy for me.  The chorus is good though – and I love that rock guitar.

Track 40: Demi Lovato – Tell Me You Love Me

Yet another one that wasn’t a hit – this one only got to number 85!

It’s got a good atmosphere though – really like those instrumentals.  The tune’s nice, but it’s a bit slow for me.

Track 41: Maroon 5 – Wait

And another non-hit – number 79 for this song.

Not keen on this tune – it’s pretty generic.

Track 42: James Bay – Wild Love

This one’s too slow for me.  Nice tune though.

Track 43: Rag ‘N’ Bone Man – As You Are

The complete opposite of a hit.  This didn’t chart at all!

I like the instrumentals at the start, but again it’s not upbeat enough for my liking.

Track 44: U2 – You’re The Best Thing About Me

This one, meanwhile, only got to number 92.

It’s nice to hear some rock music, but the tune’s a bit dull.  It’s got a good retro-sounding instrumental in the middle though.

Track 45: Oasis – Live Forever

This wasn’t actually back in the charts this year (so it’s yet another non-hit, although of course it was a hit on its original release in 1994), but there was an increased awareness of it due to Liam Gallagher performing it at the Brits in tribute to the Manchester Arena bombing victims.

One more thing: I just want to add a quick note about all the non-hits that have littered this playlist.  While I’ve only just noticed it with this one, I suspect non-hits have been a thing for quite a few Now! compilations leading up to this, as there have been quite a few instances where I’m surprised I recognise so few of the tracks (as I mentioned in the intro, while it is tough to remember hundreds of generic songs, I have followed the charts religiously this decade and have a good memory).

I’m not sure how I feel about this.  I can sort of understand it in a way, as 95% of chart music in the late ’10s is woefully, utterly dire.  It’s awful – the worst quality it has ever been in my lifetime.  Most of it is completely generic, uninspired and half-arsed, and so I have a bit of sympathy for the Now! compilers deciding to include songs that they think are good but didn’t trouble the charts for whatever reason, rather than yet another terrible identical-sounding EDM track that somehow managed to get to number 24 for a few weeks.

At the same time, what I’ve always liked about the Now! compilations is that they do reflect the most popular music of the time – good and bad.  I feel that including songs that weren’t hits, that weren’t soundtracking people’s lives by being played on the radio and on TV shows and at sports events – well, it kind of takes away from the status of these albums as cultural artefacts of the time.  I’m a little sad about that.  We’ll see what tomorrow brings with the release of the 100th entry in this long music marathon.

Music Review: Now! That’s What I Call Music #93

Day 93 equals Now! #93, which came out on 18th March 2016.

March 2016
This is how the world looked in March 2016. Yes, it’s me at another goth gig (this time Resistanz), wearing the same T-shirt as in yesterday’s photo. I still miss Resistanz and its £1 cans of Somersby cider, though there’s no way I could drink as many of them as I used to these days (it used to be a forty-can weekend).

On with the hits!

Now! That's What I Call Music #93
Track 1: Lukas Graham – 7 Years

It’s a nice tune, but I find the theme a bit irritating.

Track 2: Justin Bieber – Love Yourself

Another nice tune with an awkward theme.  It’s also too slow for me.

Track 3: Zayn – Pillowtalk

Zayn Malik’s first solo release since becoming the Robbie Williams/Geri Halliwell of One Direction and leaving the group about a year before they split ‘went on hiatus’.  It’s too slow for me, and the tune is pretty forgettable.

Track 4: Coldplay and Beyoncé – Hymn For The Weekend

Gorgeous tune – really like this one.

Track 5: Mike Posner – I Took A Pill In Ibiza [SeeB Remix]

Mike Posner returning to the charts with this surprise number one hit.  It’s a lovely chillout tune with a wistful theme.

Track 6: Zara Larsson – Lush Life

Solid danceable pop tune – big fan of this.

Track 7: Jonas Blue and Dakota – Fast Car

Dodgy house cover of the Tracy Chapman classic.  Should have left well alone.

Track 8: Shawn Mendes – Stitches

Pretty tune – quite like this one.

Track 9: Major Lazer, Nyla and Fuse ODG – Light It Up [Remix]

Boring tune, and it’s too slow for my liking.

Track 10: Snakehips, Tinashe and Chance The Rapper – All My Friends

Good singalong chorus, but it’s too slow for me.

Track 11: Little Mix and Jason Derulo – Secret Love Song

Horrendously saccharine and slow!  Not my kind of thing at all.

Track 12: Jess Glynne – Take Me Home

Irritating tune, and again it’s too slow.

Track 13: Ellie Goulding – Army

The tune’s quite interesting, but it’s a little too cheesy for me.

Track 14: One Direction – History

Too acoustic-y for me, but the tune’s okay.

Track 15: Selena Gomez – Hands To Myself

This tune doesn’t really do it for me, although there’s some interesting stuff going on with the backing track, and it’s got a good atmosphere.  The theme’s awful, though.

Track 16: Jason Derulo – Get Ugly

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Jason Derulo on track 11.

This one’s got a good rhythm and a slight retro tinge – I quite like it.

Track 17: Sigma and Rita Ora – Coming Home

I find this tune pretty uninspired.

Track 18: Elle King – Exes and Ohs

Great classic-sounding blues-tinged rock.  Really like this.

Track 19: Olly Murs – Stevie Knows

Love that retro-sounding funk.  Good stuff.

Track 20: Jack Garratt – Worry

Slow and boring, with some odd instrumentals that are very distracting.

Track 21: James Bay – If You Ever Want To Be In Love

Pretty tune, and it’s got quite a good rhythm.  I like the rock-edged guitar too.

Track 22: Lewisham & Greenwich NHS Choir – A Bridge Over You

This was the 2015 Christmas number one – a charity choral offering.  It was the first time, due to streaming becoming more popular than downloading, that the X Factor winner’s single didn’t really get a look in for the Christmas number one – in fact, Louisa Johnson’s Forever Young is not even included on this Now! compilation, which marks the first time since Steve Brookstein’s Against All Odds from 2005 that the X Factor song has been left out by the Now! compilers.

Anyway, this song is a dodgy mash-up of Simon & Garfunkel’s Bridge Over Troubled Water and Coldplay’s Fix You, but I’m sure it raised a lot of money for charity.

Track 23: Justin Bieber – Sorry

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Justin Bieber on track 2.

I love this song, though.  It’s the only Justin Bieber song I actually like, and it’s a cracker.

Track 24: The Weeknd – The Hills

Great atmosphere, but I’m not keen on the theme.

Track 25: Coldplay – Adventure Of A Lifetime

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Coldplay on track 4.

I find the warbly instrumentals on this one a bit irritating, but I do like the retro-tinged beat.

Track 26: 99 Souls, Destiny’s Child and Brandy – The Girl Is Mine

Mash-up of Destiny’s Child’s Girl and Brandy and Monica’s The Boy Is Mine (which was itself based on Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney’s The Girl Is Mine).  Brandy re-recorded her vocals, Monica didn’t, which I guess explains the credit.  I do quite like the electro lines on this track, and it’s not as messy as you would expect from a mash-up.

Track 27: Tinie Tempah and Zara Larsson – Girls Like

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Zara Larsson on track 6.

I quite like this one – it’s very danceable.

Track 28: Fleur East – Sax

I’m a big fan of this one, but you expected that, didn’t you?  Saxophone a-go-go.  I highly approve.

Track 29: Craig David and Big Narstie – When The Bassline Drops

The start of Craig David’s inexplicable but strangely welcome comeback!  This one’s got a good beat, and, as should probably be expected, a bit of an early ’00s tinge.

Track 30: David Guetta, Sia and Fetty Wap – Bang My Head

I find the beat on this one a bit jarring, and the tune’s pretty bland.

Track 31: Sigala and Bryn Christopher – Sweet Lovin’

Another forgettable tune, and I’m actually starting to get a bit fed up of the ’90s-inspired dance tracks now.

Track 32: Kygo and Maty Noyes – Stay

Again, this tune doesn’t do anything for me.

Track 33: Mount and Nicholas Haelg – Something Good

Not a cover of the Utah Saints track, which is probably for the best, given how many versions of that one have shown up on Now! compilations.  This one’s a dance track with some interesting instrumentals, but yet another generic, unmemorable tune.

Track 34: The Chainsmokers and Rozes – Roses

There’s a good atmosphere buried in there somewhere, but the track’s too messy to feel it, really.

Track 35: Alessia Cara – Here

Really don’t like this tune at all – I find it very grating.

Track 36: Alan Walker – Faded

Another slow, boring track.  The beat does pick up, but it doesn’t get any more interesting.

Track 37: G-Eazy and Bebe Rexha – Me, Myself And I

I quite like the rhythm on the vocals, but I’m not keen on the tune.

Track 38: Robin Schulz and Francesco Yates – Sugar

I like the guitar at the start, and it’s got a good beat.

Track 39: Dawin and Silentó – Dessert [Remix]

The lines on this are pretty jarring, and the tune’s nothing special.

Track 40: AlunaGeorge and Popcaan – I’m In Control

Irritating vocals, dull song.

Track 41: Twenty One Pilots – Stressed Out

I like the reggae-tinged beat, and the chorus is great – it gives the song an awesome eerie atmosphere.  Brilliant lyrics too.

Track 42: The 1975 – The Sound

Love that classic pop feel – big fan of this track.

Track 43: Charlie Puth – One Call Away

Pretty tune, but it’s too slow and saccharine for me.

Track 44: David Bowie – Heroes

1977 classic back in the charts after David Bowie’s passing.  I’m still sad about Bowie being gone even two and a half years later, and I wish I didn’t now associate this one with it being everywhere in early 2016.  The song is as beautiful as everything else he did.

Music Review: Now! That’s What I Call Music #91

Day 91 brings us to Now! #91, which was released on 24th July 2015.

July 2015
This is the way the world looked in July 2015. The South of France was predictably warm, and we were enjoying the holiday gîte that Mum and Dad had rented – with plenty space for the six of us, although Geth and I only overlapped with Malcolm and Steff for the one night. Looking forward to another family get-together very soon!

On with the summer hits!

Now! That's What I Call Music #91
Track 1: Ellie Goulding – Love Me Like You Do

Irritatingly saccharine ballad, made worse by being from the soundtrack of the Fifty Shades Of Grey movie.

Track 2: Wiz Khalifa and Charlie Puth – See You Again

Pretty tune on the chorus, and it’s got a good atmosphere.  Quite like this one.

Track 3: OMI and Felix Jaehn – Cheerleader

Nice upbeat pop song – big fan of this.

Track 4: Jason Derulo – Want To Want Me

Another solid pop tune.  Great danceable track.

Track 5: Little Mix – Black Magic

It’s got a good beat, but I’m not keen on the tune.

Track 6: Tinie Tempah and Jess Glynne – Not Letting Go

I like the ’90s tinge, but the tune’s pretty dull.

Track 7: Major Lazer, DJ Snake and Mø – Lean On

That chorus should annoy me, but I actually quite like it.

Track 8: Years & Years – Shine

Interesting rhythm, and there’s a nice ’80s synthy tinge to the electro lines.

Track 9: Aston Merrygold – Get Stupid

Great mid-century retro sound, great upbeat tune.  Good track.

Track 10: Walk The Moon – Shut Up And Dance

I love this one – it’s a fantastic rock-edged party song that sounds like it dropped straight out of the ’80s!  A favourite.

Track 11: Rita Ora – Poison

Quite like this tune, though I could do without the jarring instrumentals on the chorus.

Track 12: Natalie La Rose and Jeremih – Somebody

Very irritating interpolation of Whitney Houston’s I Wanna Dance With Somebody, which I can’t really get past.  The rest of the track’s just bland.

Track 13: Nick Jonas – Jealous

I’ve always been torn about the lyric ‘it’s my right to be hellish/I still get jealous‘.  On the one hand it’s super creepy and abusive and squicky.  On the other hand, it’s a fantastic rhyme in a musical landscape where lyricism is not a strong point.

To sum up: awful theme, great danceable tune.

Track 14: John Newman – Come And Get It

Love that ’80s-feel funk on the backing track.  I’m starting to sense a welcome theme to this Now! compilation!

Track 15: Ed Sheeran and Rudimental – Bloodstream

I quite like the tune on this one.

Track 16: Carly Rae Jepsen – I Really Like You

Nice upbeat pop song, even if it is a bit cheesy.

Track 17: Meghan Trainor – Dear Future Husband

The theme’s a bit awkward, but it’s a good tune.

Track 18: Iggy Azalea and Jennifer Hudson – Trouble

I like the instrumentals, and it’s got a good rhythm.

Track 19: Jessie J – Flashlight

Too slow and ballad-y for me.

Track 20: James Bay – Let It Go

I like the guitar at the start, but the vocals annoy me.

Track 21: Florence & The Machine – Ship To Wreck

I find the chorus on this one pretty irritating, but the atmosphere is great, and I like the folky feel.

Track 22: Hozier – Someone New

Interesting instrumentals at the start, but on the whole it’s a little too slow for me.

Track 23: Lost Frequencies – Are You With Me

Bland, forgettable tune – not keen on this one.

Track 24: Kygo and Conrad Sewell – Firestone

The tune irritates me, and the verses are too slow.

Track 25: David Zowie – House Every Weekend

Very repetitive, and there’s not enough melody for me.

Track 26: David Guetta, Nicki Minaj, Bebe Rexha and Afrojack – Hey Mama

Love the atmosphere on this one – great track.

Track 27: Flo Rida, Robin Thicke and Verdine White – I Don’t Like It, I Love It

Boring tune, uninspired theme.

Track 28: Galantis – Runaway (U And I)

The vocal style irritates me, and it’s another dull tune.

Track 29: Skrillex, Diplo and Justin Bieber – Where Are Ü Now

The lines are too jarring for me, and the tune’s really bland.

Track 30: Krept & Konan and Jeremih – Freak Of The Week

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Jeremih on track 12.

Good rhythm, good atmosphere – again I could do with a bit more melody though.

Track 31: Fifth Harmony and Kid Ink – Worth It

I really like that trumpet at the start, and it’s got a great beat – very danceable track.

Track 32: Deorro and Chris Brown – Five More Hours

Bland tune – nothing special going on with this one.

Track 33: LunchMoney Lewis – Bills

I love this upbeat novelty track!  Happily chair-dancing here.

Track 34: Avicii – Waiting For Love

Love the tune on this, and that piano is gorgeous.

Track 35: Clean Bandit – Stronger

I find some of the lines a bit jarring, and the tune’s fairly bland.  Good rhythm, though.

Track 36: Sam Feldt and Kimberly Anne – Show Me Love

Slow chillout cover of the Robin S classic, which has itself featured on a fair few Now! compilations over the years.  It’s not my kind of thing, but at least they did something different with the song.

Track 37: Blonde and Alex Newell – All Cried Out

Highly irritating tune, uninspired beat.

Track 38: Kygo and Parson James – Stole The Show

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Kygo on track 24.

Another boring song.

Track 39: Rudimental and Foy Vance – Never Let You Go

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Rudimental on track 15.

Again, I find this tune very bland and forgettable.

Track 40: Pep & Rash – Rumours

The vocals are quite interesting, and there’s some intriguing beepy stuff going on, but on the whole it’s too messy for me.

Track 41: Dr Kucho, Gregor Salto, Ane Brun and Oliver Heldens – Can’t Stop Playing (Makes Me High)

I am literally yawning right now.  One too many boring dance tracks.

Track 42: Lethal Bizzle and Diztortion – Fester Skank

This one’s brilliantly daft (sample lyric: ‘you might see me in a Lambo/camo snapback, Rambo/five hundred horses, Django/two-two chicken, Nando‘) and very danceable.  Great stuff.

Track 43: Martin Garrix and Usher – Don’t Look Down

The tune annoys me – not keen on this.

Track 44: Tove Lo – Talking Body

Awkward theme, generic tune.  Dull end to a generally poor disc two.

Music Review: Now! That’s What I Call Music #90

Day 90!  This means Now! #90, which came out on 30th March 2015.

March 2015
This is how the world looked in March 2015 – or more specifically, how Southampton looked on our very last night there. We moved to Newcastle the next day. I’ve blogged about these phone boxes before. Fun fact: I got my hair cut into that blunt bob in the hope of looking like the girl in the video for Last Christmas by Wham! but it didn’t really work out for me, unsurprisingly.

Nine-tenths of the way through this Now! marathon!  Let’s see (or hear, rather) what music sounded like as we entered the second half of the decade.

Now! That's What I Call Music #90
Track 1: Mark Ronson and Bruno Mars – Uptown Funk

This is hands down my favourite song of the ’10s.  The ’80s-tinged funk sound, the beat, the lyrics – just wonderful.  I love it.

Track 2: Ed Sheeran – Thinking Out Loud

It’s a slow ballad, so it’s not the kind of thing I’d usually be a fan of, but I do actually really like this.

Track 3: Years & Years – King

Good tune – big fan of this one.

Track 4: Maroon 5 – Sugar

Another good, danceable tune.

Track 5: James Bay – Hold Back The River

It’s the kind of thing that would normally be too acoustic-y for me, but the rhythm is great, so I quite like it.

Track 6: Sam Smith – Like I Can

Sam Smith finally releases something a bit upbeat!  Another good track.

Track 7: Olly Murs and Demi Lovato – Up

I really like this duet – it’s got a great rhythm and a lovely tune.  Good stuff.

Track 8: Meghan Trainor – Lips Are Movin’

I find this one to be a bit of a disappointing follow-up to All About That Bass, but I suppose it’s got a good beat.

Track 9: Jess Glynne – Hold My Hand

This tune really irritates me.

Track 10: Sia – Elastic Heart

Good rhythm, and the tune’s quite interesting.

Track 11: Ben Haenow – Something I Need

The X Factor winner for 2014, this year doing a cover of a OneRepublic song.  As usual, it’s pretty uninspiring.  At the time of writing, this was the last X Factor winner’s single to get the Christmas number one, and hopefully – due to the combination of the X Factor finishing earlier in December nowadays and the continued increase in streaming and related decline in downloads in chart figures – it will remain that way forever.

Track 12: Take That – These Days

It’s Fake That version II, now only featuring Gary Barlow, Mark Owen and Howard Donald!  Mind you, after the happy reunion of all five members for the Progress album, I’m actually okay with the lineup swapping about a bit.  I’ve made my peace with that.  Only took me twenty years.

This song is quite good, actually.  Great beat, nice tune.

Track 13: One Direction – Night Changes

It’s a saccharine ballad, but I don’t hate the tune.

Track 14: Alesso and Tove Lo – Heroes (We Could Be)

This tune, on the other hand, is incredibly irritating.  It’s nothing to do with the David Bowie classic, but Bowie and Brian Eno were apparently credited anyway due to the identical title.  Nice to see some actual acknowledgment there – most artists releasing songs with identical titles to classics don’t bother.

Track 15: Kelly Clarkson – Heartbeat Song

Another highly annoying tune.

Track 16: Calvin Harris and Haim – Pray To God

I really like this one – the tune’s lovely and it builds really nicely.

Track 17: David Guetta and Emeli Sandé – What I Did For Love

I quite like the tune on the chorus, and it’s got a good atmosphere.

Track 18: Usher and Juicy J – I Don’t Mind

It’s got a nice smooth soulful feel to it, but the tune’s fairly uninspired and the theme is kind of creepy.

Track 19: Marlon Roudette – When The Beat Drops Out

Love those steel drums, and the tune is quite nice.

Track 20: Chris Brown and Tyga – Ayo

The tune’s okay, but on the whole the song’s pretty uninspired.

Track 21: Fergie – LA Love (La La)

‘Not on Spotify’ Type 2: YouTube Pause (TM).

Good atmosphere, but the vocals are extremely annoying.

Track 22: Tough Love – So Freakin’ Tight

Repetitive and irritating, and the theme’s very awkward.

Track 23: Philip George – Wish You Were Mine

I like the My Cherie Amour sample, but the rest of the track’s pretty forgettable.

Track 24: Avicii – The Nights

Good chant-along song – quite like this one.

Track 25: Calvin Harris and Ellie Goulding – Outside

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Calvin Harris on track 16.

Dull, forgettable tune, though the atmosphere on the chorus is quite good.

Track 26: David Guetta and Sam Martin – Dangerous

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had David Guetta on track 17.

Great tune, wonderful atmosphere – some really interesting lines going on here.

Track 27: Flo Rida, Sage The Gemini and Lookas – GDFR

Good rhythm, but there’s not enough melody for me.

Track 28: DJ Fresh and Ella Eyre – Gravity

Boring tune, uninspired beat.

Track 29: Sigma and Labrinth – Higher

The atmosphere’s okay, but again the tune’s pretty dull.

Track 30: Tchami and Kaleem Taylor – Promesses

Nothing exciting going on with this track except for the bizarre spelling of ‘promises’ in the title, which is just irritating.

Track 31: Blonde and Melissa Steel – I Loved You

Good beat, but it’s another bland tune.

Track 32: Oliver Heldens and KStewart – Last All Night (Koala)

Really interesting electro lines going on in this track, and it’s very danceable.

Track 33: Wretch 32 – 6 Words

Slow and boring, with a slightly jarring beat.

Track 34: Charli XCX and Rita Ora – Doing It

Extremely bland and uninspired tune.  It actually depresses me how terrible it is.

Track 35: Ne-Yo – Coming With You

Another boring tune, and repetitive to boot.

Track 36: Cheryl – I Don’t Care

Great beat, good solid pop song.

Track 37: Karen Harding – Say Something

Irritating tune, not my cup of tea.

Track 38: Gorgon City and Jennifer Hudson – Go All Night

Yet another dull, forgettable tune.

Track 39: Alex Adair – Make Me Feel Better

Dance track that sounds like every other dance track of the era.

Track 40: Labrinth – Jealous

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Labrinth on track 29.

This one is notoriously depressing.  I’m going to have to line up about twenty ’80s party tracks to cheer myself up after this compilation is done.

Track 41: Ella Henderson – Yours

Yet another depressing ballad.

Track 42: Rixton – Wait On Me

Finally, something upbeat!  I like the rhythm on this one.

Track 43: McBusted – Air Guitar

Unholy cross between the two biggest British pop-pop-punk bands of the ’00s, Busted and McFly.  It’s as cringeworthy as you’d expect, but at least it’s not another slow ballad.

Track 44: Florence & The Machine – What Kind Of Man

Good atmosphere, and I like the rock guitar once the track gets going.

Track 45: Sam Smith – Lay Me Down

Repeated artist alert!  We’ve already had Sam Smith on track 6.

Back to the depressing slow ballads.  What was making people so miserable in early 2015?  Time to line up I’m Still Standing and get out of here.